is:

  1. thoroughly knowing yourself, what you feel, and what you want
  2. deciding
  3. defending your decision
  4. having support for your decision
  5. understanding the implications of your decision and understanding that your feeling, desire, and decision might be wrong
  6. committing to facing the outcomes of your decision and reassessing ongoing changes in your feelings, desires, and strategies.

and, by extension:

  1. building trust and thoroughly knowing each other, what we feel, and what we want
  2. somehow deciding together
  3. somehow defending our decision
  4. having support for our decision
  5. understanding the implications of our decision and understanding that our feelings, desires, and decision might be wrong
  6. committing to facing the outcomes of our decision, fairly, and reassessing ongoing changes in our feelings, desires, and strategies.
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